Showing the kind of grace under pressure usually reserved for major natural disasters, the volunteer crew rigged up the necessary recovery gear. After a brief battle against gravity and a whole lot of muck, the firefighters successfully hoisted the delivery vehicle back onto solid ground.
No packages were harmed in the making of this rescue, though a few cardboard boxes may now feature a custom, artisanal Laurelville mud-splatter design.
The Laurelville Volunteer Fire Department gently reminds all motorists—whether you are carrying life-saving medical supplies or a three-pack of identical cat ears you bought at 2:00 AM—that if a road looks like it hasn’t been graded since the McKinley administration, your GPS is wrong. Turn around.
The FedEx truck has since returned to civilization, and deliveries have officially resumed. As for the driver? Rumor has it he will be sticking strictly to paved, double-lane state routes for the foreseeable future.
